**If you choose to read the entire post, you are entitled to your opinion however, snide and rude remarks are not appreciated. Like Planet Fitness “This Is A Judgement Free Zone”.**
Let me first explain that being a mistress is never preferred and if you can avoid it, I would if I were you. That being said, sometimes shit happens. The thing about being the “other woman” is it is not all it’s cracked to be and it’s not that easy to stop something once you’ve started it. I speak from experience. I had once seen myself becoming involved with a married man. Which led to me to seek advice from a friend. The #1 thing she told me NOT to do is to develop feelings or fall in love with the married man I was getting involved with. Of course she advised me not to continue my relationship with him and that no matter what, the results would not be a good one.
Oh how I wish I would’ve listened to her. She was right, one of us had started to develop feelings beyond sex. I wanted to write about my experience, because I want to live in a world, where even when we as women, make mistakes (and are willing to pay the consequences for those mistakes), that we are not completely bullied and massacred. We as women need to support each other, even when the shit hits the fan. My best friend told me that she didn’t agree with my decision to be involved with a married man, but that she still loved me and was my friend.
I felt mixed emotions throughout the entire relationship. I remember we were hugging and kissing while he was on the phone with his wife. I’m sure some of you are asking didn’t I feel guilty? Sometimes but for the most part I didn’t. I thought, I for sure am going to burn in hell for this, but that didn’t matter to me, because I wanted him and he wanted me. Also, we were working together at the time, so the temptation was even greater. We would go into our bosses office and sneak in a kiss or two when he wasn’t in the office. The fact that I was degrading myself by being the other woman didn’t matter to me. I repeatedly asked him why he wasn’t happy with his wife and he never could give me a straight answer. In the end he said that he realized he wasn’t fair to me, that he thought I was a remarkable woman and that he wanted to be with me.
I even researched how to be a mistress online (I know I’m crazy). Most of my research pointed out to how horrible the mistress was. That mistresses are weak and have psychological problems. That they are premiscous sluts. Not that I’m a great person, but lets focus on the husband for a minute. He’s the one who is cheating on his wife. I was not married. I never approached him about being with him, he approached me, seduced me. After awhile, I got sick of him using me (which was what he was doing). He had no intention of leaving his wife, and I never wanted to be in a real relationship with him. After all, once a cheater, always a cheater right?
We were both wrong and I do regret being involved with a married man and I feel bad for his wife. But, I wanted to write about my experience, because I wanted a piece of literature out in the world that wasn’t completely shunning the mistress. The mistress is a human and does have morals (well most of them I’m guessing). Let’s not stone the mistress unless she’s a complete bitch with perfect breasts and wears a size 0 jeans-then I hate her too. My close friends know what I did and they are still are my friends even after my mistake.
My advice to any woman who is contemplating or already in a relationship (or just having sex) with a married man is, be careful! I’m not saying don’t do it, because you’ll always do what you want to do. But, just be cautious. Take my friend’s advice and don’t fall in love with him. Be safe (use birth control!!!!!) and use even more protection on your heart. Also, never put down his wife, nor be jealous of her. He was hers in the first place and always will be.
P.S. The sex was the worst sex in my life.